I think we’re at a very confusing point in our now transitioning lives! I’m a middle-aged peri menopausal woman, so I am very uncertain about what feelings relate to what! The brain fog normally attributed to the peri menopause is also likely to be part of a transition anxiety that I seem to have developed!
I reflect upon 2019, a year packed full of adventure, when I felt at the peak of health & fitness and had a sense of being able to accomplish anything. I climbed Snowdon, trekked the Sahara Desert, had ski lessons, wake board lessons and much more! I had a clear path of what I could achieve and how empowering that was & that I was in the control seat of life for probably the first time, for me. I had discovered the My Time for Change programme, lost weight, improved fitness, mental strength and overall greater wellbeing.
A year later and the sense of adventure has been replaced by confusion. I still feel great, my fitness regime has continued thanks to Emma Wilson Fitness pivoting her business so all classes have been available on line. I have remained part of the My Time for Change programme so continued to thrive on the health giving foods and positive community. Although, I have definitely swelled a little around the middle, due to less daily movement and a few extra calories consumed, mainly in the weekend wine-fuelled lockdown routine that has emerged! I’m comfortable though that my health is still happy and that the My Time for Change lifestyle can help me make tiny tweaks to reduce the thickening if that becomes important to me.
The most confusion for me though comes from the muddle of emotion and thoughts! One minute I’m in control and have a clear path toward a ‘new normal’, the next I am dazed & confused with no sense of direction. Oh and as a serial hugger, I am yet to overcome the loss of warmth, love and oxytocin generated by hugging friends. Sadly, I am not womanly enough to delete this need from my psyche! (Although Phil & the children are gorgeous huggers I must add!)
Having read several articles about people’s lockdown experiences, there does seem to be a pattern of post traumatic stress. We have all been forced into heightened states of fight & flight by a pandemic that none of us were programmed to deal with. For months we have thrived on Adrenalin and as a seeker of positivity, I have enjoyed most of what lockdown has brought to my world and the company I have kept. However we are now depleted, exhausted and ready for a break. But then there is the mental confusion of understanding what a break now means to us all? Sun seekers no longer have as many choices, whether that be through fear of travel or the lack of available destinations. UK travellers, unless organised, are left with very few options. And if you are like me, you don’t even know whether you want to go away or stay cocooned in the lockdown shell.
Decisions have become so difficult to make, emotions have become so hard to rationalise and everything is just a bit too uncertain. We’ve all approached the pandemic in different ways and our own journeys are reflected in how we have prioritised as rules have loosened. I am sure that soon the fog will clear a little!
I & others on the programme are so glad to have had Emma and the My Time for Change programme as a constant throughout lockdown; offering some control, a strong community, motivation & lots of health giving benefits during such a surreal time for us all. Emma creates daily vlogs that equip us with the knowledge, inspiration and motivation to make tweaks to our lifestyle to help us reach our goals, or often get us through some of the daily fog!
There are some exciting times ahead for Emma & I as we develop the My Time for Change programme; a path that is brightly lit in the mist! There will be brightly lit paths for us all, we may just have to be patient and not judge ourselves as we work our way through our thoughts & emotions in such uncertain times.
Lockdown has given opportunities for reflection and I hope we can all find our clear pathways full of health & wellbeing as we find our way out of Lockdown.